5. More of the wet stuff

West again, but with a colleague today. To my mind just another case of those higher up not having a clue about what happens on the street. Time and time again we tell them that West does not need 2 PA's to cover it, even on market days, as the beat is so small - they'd be better off moving spare resources (damn - mgmt speak - forgive me) to the areas that do need them (East on market days). But no, they obviously know better, so we have two PA's struggling like mad to get the obligatory 10 tickets apiece from an area where one PA has trouble meeting the targets (oooh sorry, I keep forgetting I'm not allowed to call them that)

So, we split the miniscule beat up (obviously we are not allowed to patrol together), with me taking one end comprising half of the high street, the contentious loading bays and 20 or so 20 min bays, and my colleague the other half with the 3 car parks and an equally contentious bus stop and 02 area.

Things went quite well my end - by midday I'd collared seven miscreants, mainly from the loading / disabled bays and was thinking I'd hit my 'target' without too many problems. My Colleague had bugger all so we stopped for lunch. For the afternoon I gave my colleague the opportunity to take the 'busy' end but she wanted to stay put and thats the way it stayed. Suffice to say I got nowt for the next 3 hours while my colleague was tripping over illegals, garnering her a healthy 12 in just over 2 hours (BITCH !!!) - and just to add insult to injury I was soaked right through and feeling fairly miserable.

After she had left for home (early shift) I headed off to pastures new ie the now PAless East to see if I could get the last three tickets required to keep my head off the chopping block. Ninety mins later I had collared another seven much to my amazement so returned to the office.

Since Mgmt have imposed these 'guidelines' of 10 per day, the job has changed from one being fairly easy going with a good atmosphere and rapport with ones colleagues to a state of back stabbing nervousness and a healthy mistrust nee hatred of the blue collar brigade. You develop your own codes when out there and I refuse point blank to slap a PCN on some poor sod whose rear wheel is 2 inches over a DYL just to make some stuck up arse of a manager happy. If I get the 'target' then fine, but they have to realise that there are days when you can't do it, no matter how hard you try.

On a lighter note :-
For three years, the traffic warden had been taking his brief vacations at this country inn. The last time he’d finally managed an affair with the innkeeper’s daughter. Looking forward to an exciting few days, he dragged his suitcase up the stairs of the inn, then stopped short. There sat his lover with an infant on her lap! “Helen, why didn’t you write when you learned you were pregnant?” he cried. “I would have rushed up here, we could have gotten married, and the baby would have my name!” “Well,” she said, “when my folks found out about my condition, we sat up all night talkin’ and talkin’ and decided it would be better to have a b----d in the family than a traffic warden.”